Tips for Managing Seasonal Stress and Sadness

The holiday season is often referred to as “the most wonderful time of the year”—but for many, it can feel like the most stressful or even the most lonely. Between the pressure to create the perfect holiday moments, spending time with family, and trying to check off an ever-growing to-do list, it’s no wonder that feelings of stress, sadness, and even anxiety can creep in. If you’re feeling down or overwhelmed this time of year, you might be experiencing what’s known as the “holiday blues.”

What Are the Holiday Blues?

The holiday blues refer to feelings of sadness, isolation, low energy, and a lack of motivation that can occur during the holiday season. While these feelings may be temporary, they can still be challenging to navigate, especially when the rest of the world seems to be filled with joy and holiday cheer. According to Anna Costakis, MD, a psychiatrist at Northwell Staten Island University Hospital, holiday blues can manifest in various ways, from feeling uncharacteristically down to struggling with loneliness or stress.

It’s important to note that the holiday blues are different from clinical depression. While the blues tend to be temporary and tied to the specific pressures or emotions associated with the holidays, clinical depression involves a longer duration and a more intense cluster of symptoms. As Dr. Vanessa Kennedy, psychologist at Driftwood Recovery, explains, the holiday blues are typically short-lived, while clinical depression can affect your ability to function in everyday life.

Common Triggers for the Holiday Blues

Several factors can contribute to the holiday blues, and understanding these triggers is the first step in managing your emotions during this busy time. Some common causes include:

• Unrealistic Expectations: We often create mental pictures of what the holidays should be—perfect meals, flawless gift exchanges, and happy family gatherings. When things fall short of these expectations, it can leave you feeling disappointed and stressed, Dr. Duckworth, chief medical officer for the National Alliance on Mental Illness, says.
• Overcommitting to Holiday Events: From shopping and cooking to attending multiple family parties, the holiday season can quickly become overwhelming. Dr. Kennedy points out that overcommitting can lead to exhaustion and burnout, making it difficult to enjoy the festivities.
• Spending Time with Family: For many, the holidays are a time for family gatherings, but this can be a source of stress if there are family conflicts, unresolved issues, or tense conversations. Additionally, the absence of a loved one who has passed can trigger grief and sadness.
• Reflecting on What’s Missing in Your Life: The holidays often prompt self-reflection, which can bring up feelings of longing for things that aren’t where you want them to be. Seeing everyone’s “perfect” holiday moments on social media can exacerbate feelings of inadequacy or loneliness.
• Loneliness: If you’re away from family or grieving the loss of loved ones, the holidays can highlight feelings of isolation. Being surrounded by others who seem to be enjoying themselves can make you feel even more alone.
• Financial Stress: Between buying gifts and hosting dinners, the financial pressure of the holidays can add to your stress. Dr. Duckworth explains that the commercialization of the season can make it feel as though you need to spend money to keep up, even when finances are tight.
• Disruptions in Routine: With holiday parties, late nights, and changes in eating and sleeping habits, it’s easy to fall out of your usual routine. Dr. Kennedy notes that these disruptions, combined with shorter daylight hours, can leave you feeling sluggish and irritable.

Who Is Most Affected by the Holiday Blues?

The holiday blues can affect anyone, regardless of age, gender, or background. However, individuals who are already struggling with mental health conditions, such as depression or anxiety, may be more susceptible to experiencing heightened feelings of sadness or stress during the holidays. According to Dr. Costakis, those with a history of mental health challenges are particularly at risk for recurrent holiday blues, especially if they feel overwhelmed or unsupported.

8 Tips for Coping with the Holiday Blues

If you’re feeling down this holiday season, it’s important to take steps to manage your mental health. Here are eight strategies to help you navigate the challenges of the holidays:

1. Set Healthy Boundaries: You don’t have to attend every party or engage in every family gathering. It’s okay to say no, leave early, or take time for yourself. Setting boundaries is crucial for your well-being.
2. Learn from Past Holidays: If you’ve faced challenges during the holidays in previous years, reflect on what worked and what didn’t. Dr. Duckworth suggests adjusting your approach, whether that means limiting family interactions or cutting back on alcohol.
3. Maintain Your Routine: Try to keep your regular eating, exercise, and sleep habits as much as possible. Overindulging in food or alcohol can exacerbate feelings of sadness or irritability. Staying active and taking care of your body will help you manage stress better.
4. Talk Through Your Feelings: Sharing how you feel with a trusted friend, family member, or therapist can provide relief. Talking through your emotions is a healthy way to process your feelings, and it’s likely that others are experiencing similar emotions.
5. Limit Social Media Use: Constantly scrolling through social media can make you feel like your life doesn’t measure up, especially when you see others’ picture-perfect holiday moments. Limit your time on social platforms and focus on real-life connections instead.
6. Stick to a Budget: Financial stress is a common trigger for the holiday blues. Set a realistic budget for gifts, meals, and other holiday expenses, and stick to it. Knowing your limits will help prevent unnecessary financial strain.
7. Manage Expectations: Recognize that the holidays don’t have to be perfect to be meaningful. Focus on what truly matters—whether it’s spending time with loved ones, practicing gratitude, or simply enjoying some downtime.
8. Plan Ahead for Stress-Relievers: Schedule time for self-care, such as exercise, relaxation, or a quiet moment alone. Looking ahead to a vacation or staycation after the holidays can also give you something to look forward to.

When to Seek Professional Help

For many, the holiday blues will pass once the season is over. However, if you experience persistent feelings of sadness, exhaustion, or loss of interest in things that usually bring you joy, it may be time to seek professional help. Dr. Duckworth recommends seeing a mental health professional if your symptoms last for more than a few days or if they interfere with your daily life.

If you’re already working with a therapist or counselor, check in before the holidays to discuss any specific challenges you anticipate. You may also want to increase the frequency of sessions to help you cope with stressors during this time.

If you’re struggling with intense feelings of sadness or emotional distress, consider reaching out to a support line, such as a crisis hotline (988) or a warmline, where you can talk to someone who understands what you’re going through.

The Bottom Line

While the holiday season is a time of joy for many, it can also bring stress, sadness, and feelings of isolation for others. If you’re dealing with the holiday blues, remember that you’re not alone. By managing your expectations, setting boundaries, staying connected to supportive people, and taking care of yourself, you can navigate the holidays with a little more peace and a lot less stress. And remember, it’s okay to seek help when you need it—taking care of your mental health is just as important as any holiday tradition.